Your Vote's Been Snatched by a Smooth Criminal

Iran Council Certifies Disputed Election Results

Also: How Jacko Helps the Mullahs

As previously noted...

Billy Mays Died.
...

John Edwards has a sex tape out there floating around, possibly.

Also in the news Honduran President Manuel Zelaya has returned from a short trip to WestbyGodVirginia where he was visiting a "penpal" to find he'd been ousted by the Honduran Military.

You people.

Area 51 Salutes the Spectacle.

We are sorry to inform you that Billy Mays has left the building.

Shopping in Ithaca this weekend.

Well, are you?

The Drugs Don't Work

Corruption is Their Protection

Forget changing Congress. Let's drop a bus on them.

You Californians have been having all the fun for far to long.

Democratic In-Fighting, Old-Time Party Bosses and Gridlock That Lasted Weeks, in 1965

Politically Inert

I'm trying to compose a piece this morning for Agitprop concerning the sudden emergence of the absolute Superstate, but I am finding myself absolutely repelled by any involvement or endorsement of the SuperState whether it be our own, Iran's, China's or any number one can think of...they're out there.

Our own SuperState is certainly not as oppressive or brutal as a Iran or China for we have learned to appease the teeming masses with bread and circuses (in our case, Fast Food and 150 channels of television). We have learned to allow carefully sanctioned pressure releases of protest to permeate the system; it gives the masses the illusion and delusion that they still have rights and power, when in fact they are being carefully monitored and regulated. Some dissent is necessary in the service of the SuperState's perceived sense of equilibrium and its covenant with the masses ("of the people, by the people, for the people..." yeah right....), but it must be sanctioned and carefully mediated. Ultimately it is most successful when it can be usurped as a commodity and sold back to the public safely.

With the election of Obama, the fate of the U.S SuperState has been sealed. The work was begun by the previous administration moments after the planes hit The World Trade Center Towers and the framework they completed in 7 short years is a testament to their dedication and vision. Obama and susequent administrations will not undo or turn back the clock; they shall only increase the scope of the SuperState. And you will be grateful. Grateful you have a roof over your head. Grateful you have an income even though it comes at the expense of a daily offering of your soul. Grateful you have plentiful medicines and liquors to placate the misgivings. Grateful for the vast array of consumer choices available. In return the SuperState asks that you don't question or undermine it's power and authority...in return, you shall receive all of the above.

Politics As Usual

This Is Your President

(before someone goes off half-cocked accusing me of being a racist for portraying Obama as a white blank screen, there was a technical consideration to factor in: the background of our template is black and the blank screen wouldn't have been visible)

Okay, now that we've taken care of possibly offending Proggel sensitivities, let's get down to business.
This is what you elected America, a blank screen. A blank screen upon which you could project your hopes, dreams and aspirations. And they let you. His campaign staff was brilliant at projecting right back at you what you so desperately needed to see and hear; they never told you a lie-they just polished up your projections a bit and played them back at you. You bought your own lies. Absolutely brilliant. And then the deal closer: Together You Were All Making History! By electing the first African-American to the office you were all participating in making wondrous History that you could share with your children! And of course, being African-American provided great cover because anyone who dared call Obama's bluff was automatically a racist or unenlightened. You did your job America, you got him elected.

Just five months into this new administration I'm having trouble telling it apart from the previous administration. Okay, Obama is smarter than Bush, has a winning smile and wears a suit very well. We don't have as many stupid utterances coming out of the White House (that's Biden's job). But from a policy standpoint, I'm not seeing a whole lot of change I can believe in. In fact I'm seeing the continuation of a lot of policies that Obama promised (at your insistence) he would remedy. What I'm seeing is a superb politician in action...pure simulacrum...and to think they used to call Clinton "slick Willie." Obama is going to out charm, out manuver, out smart anything and anyone that will seek to dispel The Great Delusion...so be prepared and don't forget that we've been warning you for months about this.....

Obama angers wall street... briefly

what's the over under on when he'll "negotiate" his proposed protections away?

And now for a brief rant.

I don't care. I don't. Something is going on in Iran...I know there is because they wont stop blathering about it on the teevee. No one has as of yet made a compelling case to me why we should be involved with what goes on in any of these countries (of which Iran seems to be the epicenter).

I know--or seem to have absorbed--that in one corner we have Mohammed Ahmadinejad, I'madinnerjacket, whatever, favorite boogeyman of the likes of John Bolton... and in the other Mir Hossein Mousavi, "gray-bearded 67-year-old [who] was at the heart of a regime that executed dissidents, took U.S. hostages and launched a fatwa against author Salman Rushdie." Change we can believe in I guess.

Which reminds me, hows our boy doing? You remember, that guy, Barack Obama... now don't get all crazy, I didn't mean "boy" in that southern GOP kinda way, I meant it in that vaguely urban, "holla at ya boy" way. Shit, that doesn't work either, huh? It's hard out here for a Progressive. Not that I feel that much aligned with Pwoggies anymore.

I'm also not referring to the Administration's struggling for right response to Iran. No I mean all that Pinko Commie Lib shit he's been pulling, denying full Federal health benefits to same sex couples, bombing civilians indiscriminately in Pakistan via drones, or any of the growing list of broken promises he's racked up...I was just wondering if you figured out a way to care about it all. Cause I can't, really. Certainly don't care to show up at a voting booth anytime in the next 2 to 4 years either.

See, I Told You So...

Six months ago I warned of the dangers of winged terrorists. Now, government experts have conceded that geese can and will destroy our passenger airline industry. Except they're all defeatist about it, whereas I advocated exterminating the Canadian bastards.

To paraphrase my pal The Culture Ghost from the other day...for an eclectic confederation of goofballs, we've called a few things right. (See why we voted for Gus Hall?!?)

We therefore recognize ourselves for being the deeply suspicious, cynical and misanthropic miscreants we are.

Iranian Election Results

Sully is following the unfolding catastrophe by the moment.

My theme song this minute.

Reunited Blur Perform Live At A Museum In Essex

DIY Glossary

The blog, Shakesville, having undergone a successful transformation from a blog of annoying Proggel outrage and buffoonery to one of pure madness, will henceforth be known as "Malkinville " around these parts. Please make a notation in your handbooks. Thank you.

The Solution for Everything

Instead of opting for a send off by keyboard cat, we Area 51ers send in the bus.

for adam

OH YEAH!

Roseanne: 'Everybody's On The (Obama) Kool-Aid'

image re-post from the early days

Thursday, Friday, Saturday...

I know I've posted this song before at sometime in the past, somewhere. Just feels right, right now...

continuing the theme of imaginary solutions to nonsensical problems

Da Bus Is Coming For You

"White people got no business playing the blues ever."

Even George Carlin was wrong. Once.

They're Back...and they're coming for you.

Coming To A Town Near You

We're Waiting

Hamas Has Better Things To Do Than Watch a U.S. President Deliver a Speech

Law and Order

Everyone is up in arms about an Asian caricature, I can't believe they overlooked the following from Time:

we want more hits, hence...

at the risk of being overly crude, i offer these gigantic boobies as a humble offering to the internet gods. please continue to smile on our wee corner of your world.

John Galt and His Trusty Steed Rescue Buxom Dames from Evil Socialist Bureaucrats

Bill of Goods

I'd like to be one of the first and one of the many to point out that the American electorate sold itself a first rate bill of goods. You projected your pipe dreams, your unrealistic hopes, your quest for redemption and salvation on Him...and He let you. He did nothing but shape himself according to your desires and then you elected him (don't get me wrong, McCain would have been an unmitigated disaster for this country), but if you think Hope, Change and Progress are going to materialize like three Muses and save the nation, please put down the opium pipe.

As for me, I voted for a Dead Commie.