At the request of my comrades and cohorts....

| February 18, 2010

When I first was presented with the piece about the young woman whose "trash-talking" Facebook Page about one of her teachers was considered protected free speech and thus her lawsuit for being unfairly suspended could proceed this morning, my first reaction was, "Perhaps, if you spent more time doing your fucking homework and less time on Facebook, you might have a better relationship with said teacher."
You kids, you have no idea how easy you got it today. Why, in my day, when you wanted to write a disparaging comment about a teacher or other school official you were limited to the use of an El Marko or Super Fat Wide El Markos ( a type of writing implement) on the bathroom stall wall and so even then your audience was limited to whomever had to take a shit: "Mr. Fitzpatrick sucks rat balls." And the janitor would take it down over the weekend (see, even our acts of vandalism provided gainful employment for those charged with undoing our carnage)Now, you have Facebook, MySpace and Twitter upon which you can spend entire evenings describing in glorious detail how Mr. Fitzpatrick sucks rat balls and half the Western Civilized world can share in this with you. Of course, you could do your homework, but what's the fun in that...that's for non-cool kids. And then like, what is so hella cool is we got this thing, this piece of paper written a long ago that says I can say or write anything I want about Mr. Fitzpatrick and how he licks rat balls and no one can do anything to me because this is America and like we're totally free to say whatever we want and that what makes us so great. And my dad, got this totally awesome lawyer, who's going to sue everyone including Mr. Fitzpatrick so he can't lick rat balls any more. And I'm put it all over my Facebook Page and if anyone has a picture of Mr. Fitzpatrick licking a rat ball that would hella cool, too.